once close, sudden far

assalamua'laikum dan salam sejahtera

she had once been my friend...perhaps a close one...

we started in a social school chat...

and we can't help on being negative with each other at first...

such immature, both of us...hahaha

pangkah memangkah tu macam makan nasik di tengah hari orang kate...

weird enough, as time passed by, we are able to get clicked, talked about so many things together, get hands-in-hands with certain problem and laugh for little things on both persons....

tambah pelik, kami tak pernah berjumpa...........

" how could you bare telling me such personal things, share with me your problems, and listens to what i've been saying all this while? we don't even know each other...i might be a bad person as well, you know...."

those words eventually came straight within my tongue...

the answer her, i can't yet tell that time...but frankly says, i do smells of something....

as we get to know each other, with both of us being each other shoulder to cry onto, things get clearer...

but i just play dumb....

its all for many major reason....

aku tak mahu keseronokan kita menjadi kawan lenyap when we move to the other phase of the relationship...

i just couldn't bare it....

i love us, which being friends and pal...

i miss us, which being connected by only on the phone and internet...

i want us, but to stay in the track of limitations...

its not like i'm regretting having you as the part of memoirs, but indeed yes, i'm regretting....because you yourself don't want me to put you there...

i'm sorry...for treating you like that...it was'nt on purposes...but what can i say...thats the impact of me, to you, to us, when i tried so hard to push myself to be with you on the next serious phase....i just can't...i'm sorry...

p/s: you know what? shes looking just like you/you're looking just like her...

sepet, senyum lebar, garang...hahaha

now i'm telling you this....

yes, i miss us....

but keep in mind that i've been suggesting you on keep being a friend....

its you who decided on leaving....

and that was my biggest regrets on you....

" at least, allow me to have you in this glass rack memoirs of mine...because somehow, i smiled when my minds passed through you... "

because you, are now, had been far away from me...lost like we've been no one for each other...

" aku doakan kau bahagia dan memperoleh cinta selain aku, sepet.....kau berhak dan kau perlu....kerana itulah yang terbaik...bukan aku....but bare in mind, that i can always be your shoulder to lean on.... "

p/s: all of a sudden, i wrote bout you eh? thats because i cant help myself by thinking of you while watching this korean drama entitled ' delightful girl; chun hyang '

muke kau ngn heroin die, SEJIBIK! =p

till then, assalamu'alaikum and have a nice day